Allistaire’s Memorial Service Details – Final Update!



(All are welcome to attend either or both services)

Memorial Worship Service

(For the purpose of worshiping and submitting our lives to Jesus Christ as Lord)

Saturday, June 11th @ 10:30am

Petra Academy (4720 Classical Way, Bozeman, MT 59718)PetraClosePano_edit_edited-2-e1439256951353*Seating is limited.  If you’re coming from out-of-town, please be sure to arrive early to ensure a seat.  The service will be recorded and a link to the recording will be provided at some future point.  There is no child care provided.

*For those who don’t wish to attend this morning Memorial Worship Service, you are welcome to join Sten on a hike up the “M” trail.  Meet at the trailhead @9:30am.  (Directions:  Follow Rouse Ave. north (becomes Bridger Canyon Rd.).Turn left into the signed trailhead parking lot on left)


Celebration of Life Service

(A time to focus on Allistaire’s life)

Saturday, June 11th @ 6:30pm (MST)

The Commons (1794 Baxter Ln E, Bozeman, MT 59718)Logo-Dark-2

  • A dessert reception (cupcakes, ice cream sandwiches and coffee) will follow the service
  • Childcare for all ages WILL be available, including a live video feed into the childcare rooms for parents who want to stay with their children
  • Watch the Service LIVE, go to this LIVE STEAM LINK.  You will need to register for a Free Live Stream Account ahead of time to watch (we recommend signing up Friday or Saturday morning so you won’t be delayed in watching the 6:30 service)

Feel free to wear whatever you feel comfortable wearing, though our one request is that if possible, please weary cheery colors.  Allistaire was a girl who delighted in the full spectrum of the rainbow and it would be fun for our many bodies to reflect that joy as we gather together in honor of her life. Here are a few examples, the first being an outfit designed by Allistaire on her Toca Boca Tailor App (you don’t have to go quite this wild, but you get the picture):


Awesome Gift Basket Raffle

Sten, Solveig and I have pulled together a whole load of happy (new) items that were things that brought Allistaire delight. We are putting these together in a super fun gift basket which will be raffled off at the reception.  Raffle tickets are $1 each (so bring your cash) and all proceeds will go to The Bozeman 3.

Bozeman Three_IMG_4719_4x6_300ppiThe Bozeman 3 is a local non-profit that supports families in Gallatin County whose child has been diagnosed with cancer.  The Bozeman 3 arose out of a unique bond between three families forged in their shared experience of fighting for the lives of their children diagnosed with pediatric cancer, far from the support and beauty of their homes in the Gallatin Valley of Montana. They met in the hallways of Seattle Children’s Hospital’s Oncology Unit in early 2012. While each child faced a different form of cancer, these children, along with their parents, possessed a resolve to fight. (Our family is one of these original three, along with those of Stellablue Woods and Caden Shrauger pictured above with Allistaire)

The Bozeman 3 financially supports local families whose child has cancer, provides peer support and helps fund cancer research.

Many of the items included in the gift basket (totalling over $200) are pictured below:


We Could Use Your Help!

We have been absolutely overwhelmed with an outpouring of love and support, not only in the past four and a half years, but again in this exceptionally hard time in the wake of actually losing Allistaire.  For those who are still yearning to help, below are a number of key ways we would graciously appreciate assistance:

  • We asked for 300 cupcakes and have had far more offered – thank you again for your outpouring of kindness and love.  At this point we no longer need any additional cupcakes.  For those who have already offered, keep Rhonda Mattson’s contact handy if you have any questions ( (406) 451-6571).  And remember, ideally, we would like you to deliver your cupcakes to the main central doors at The Commons by 6:15pm on the day of the  Celebration of Life Service, June 11th. A volunteer will greet you at the door to receive your cupcakes.  (Below is an example of the look for the cupcakes we’re going for)FICC3705


  • We have created a “Wish List” on Amazon of items we could use help purchasing including plates, cups, napkins and sprinkles (to be applied to the ice cream sandwiches).  WOW!!!!  All the needed items have already been purchased less than 12 hours after posting the Amazon Link, so I have now removed it. Thank you folks!!!!!
  • The meal sign-up has been updated to reflect request for group dinners for a few days prior and after the memorial services.  Provision of meals has been an incredible help and we so appreciate all the tasty food!!!  To sign up to bring meals click HERE.


***A note to out-of-town folks: The weather in Bozeman can vary wildly with temperatures down into the 30s at night, potentially, all the way up into the 80s some days.  I would highly advise paying attention to weather as you pack and always bring a warm coat.

Thank you to so many folks who have shown their love to me personally and to our family in this past month plus.  Thank you for your cards and messages of condolence and how knowing Allistaire has impacted your life, for texts and phone calls, gifts, meals, offers to help and prayers.  Please know that all of these have been gratefully received though my ability to thank you is radically diminished and delayed.

The truth is this past near month since Allistaire died, has been a strange, mixed time which I hope to write in reflection upon more down the road.  Part of our reality is that I have been very busy with my trip back to Seattle to clear out our Ron Don apartment and say thank you and goodbye to folks and all of the work necessary to put together these two memorial services in honor of Allistaire.  In the midst of this I have two dear friends whose children have received the most awful of news – that like Allistaire, their disease has returned and grown and there is now no more treatment available to them.  I have a third friend whose child could soon be in the same position, not to mention my two friends who have recently lost their sweet girls.  My heart is still very much with these friends and if I have to prioritize my limited time and energy, it will go toward them, despite my inability to give to them in nearly the degree I desire.  I have also been able to spend time cleaning and organizing spaces in our home long neglected in my absence and enjoying being outside doing refreshing physical labor like mowing the lawn and hauling limbs that came crashing down under the weight of the fantastic snow storm a few weeks ago.

Mostly I have loved the quiet.  There are few sounds but that of bird chatter and wind in the fir and aspen trees.  With my brother-in-law, Jens’, idea of his spirit animal being a grizzly bear in mind, we have chosen the Mountain Blue Bird to be a tangible reminder of our bright blue-eyed little girl.  Mountain blue birds abound here and a family has taken up residence in the bird house across our driveway.  Throughout the morning and day, I can often look out my kitchen window and see the bright blue of sky in the form of bird sitting on the fence rail.  I of course don’t actually need a reminder of Allistaire to remember her – she is ever on my heart, in my thoughts and scattered throughout my dreams at night, but it is uniquely lovely to observe a creature of such beauty and loft – a creature that can flit about and sail up into the sky.  It helps my heart to not only grieve the loss of Allistaire in my life, but imagine in the smallest way, the joy of the life she now lives.

I look forward, with joy, to seeing many of your faces old and new, who have so loved our Allistaire and cared for our family.birdmountainbluebirdmale




21 responses »

  1. I saw you had the old Petra address listed, the new one is 4720 Classical Way, Bozeman, MT 59718. This looks like so much work, I will look to see how we can help! I’ll try to get Nic in on cooking a delicious meal, at least.

  2. Jai, thank you for that beautiful blog! As the days, months and years go by I will think of Allistaire every time I see a bluebird thus never forgetting her beautiful little soul. I’m smiling now just thinking about it! Hope to make it to the memorial but will most probably be out of town with family. Will be there in spirit if not, hope all goes well, God bless you and your family now and always. Love, nurse Kathy.

  3. It is so good to read your words, Jai. I think of and pray for your family daily. I would love to help via the Amazon link option. I am guessing that there are particular sprinkles, cups and paper plates you would like purchased but they are not appearing in the link. Sending love to you all.

  4. Jai, Sven and Solveig,
    I don’t even know what to say. I’ve been following Allistaire’s journey for probably 3 yrs, honestly, I don’t know. Long enough to fall in love with her, and long enough to think that that day would never come. She fought back so many times, my heart aches for her, as well. She just wanted to live, and I am so sad that she’s gone. You have no idea how I looked forward to seeing “Conglomeration of Joy” come up in my e-mail notifications.Omgosh I LOVED seeing her and her bright outfits, her shoes, boots, all of it. I fell in love with your baby girl and I am aching tonight for you. I miss her. I miss miss miss her. I’m sorry. I understand nothing I say will make you feel better, just know I love all of you.

  5. Jai, Sten, and Solveig,
    I don’t even know what to say. I’ve been following Allistaire’s journey for probably 3 yrs, honestly, I don’t know. Long enough to fall in love with her, and long enough to think that that day would never come. She fought back so many times, my heart aches for her, as well. She just wanted to live, and I am so sad that she’s gone. You have no idea how I looked forward to seeing “Conglomeration of Joy” come up in my e-mail notifications.Omgosh I LOVED seeing her and her bright outfits, her shoes, boots, all of it. I fell in love with your baby girl and I am aching tonight for you. I miss her. I miss miss miss her. I’m sorry. I understand nothing I say will make you feel better, just know I love all of you.

  6. I have thought about your sweet little girl Now with Jesus, and your family every day, sometimes several times a day. I pray for your hearts and all the grieving you have been doing. I’m grateful to see an update and to read your words. One thing I would like to mention because you mentioned it above. We wrote you a letter and I’m not sure if I stated this in there, but please don’t feel any pressure to reply anytime soon or at all, because we just wanted to let you know the impact Alastair and your story has impacted us and all we needed, was to write it and send it. 🙂
    I continue to pray for you guys your always in my thoughts and prayers. I love the sweet blue bird, in every picture we saw of your sweet girl, her eyes were such an intense and beautiful blue!
    God bless

  7. Praying for you all daily. Such a beautiful visual reminder of Alistaire. In our hearts forever.

  8. Dear Jai,

    We’ve been praying for Allistaire as a family daily and as a Church week after week. Thank you sharing Allistaire with us. We’ve been following your blog long enough to love her and be a part of your family. Terry, a long time friend of ours is the reason to let us acquaint with your precious Allistaire. May the God of all comfort comfort you. Lifting you all in prayer and thinking of you. The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord. Job 1:21b

    Kiran (Terry Murphy’s friend in India)

  9. Jai, my heart is broken for you! The Houston family wanted to attend, but our son has been in the hospital for several days and is having a second surgery today! We felt it best to be here with him. We will, however, watch via live stream. Anna and her husband will be there. Our thoughts and prayers are with you!!! So comforted to think that this spunky little girl is in the presence of Jesus..

  10. Jai, I viewed Allistaire’s memorial service this evening on Livestream. It was a wonderful tribute to a remarkable human being. Although she was only 6, Allistaire is my inspiration, and I am 68! We were born a day apart, she on March 6 and I on March 7. I had an autologous bone marrow transplant in March 2009 and participated in a clinical trial at the City of Hope in Duarte, CA with Zevalin,a radio immunological drug, that was also being tested in Europe at the time (Nordic Clinical Trial). Since 2009 there had been no evidence of cancer until April of this year. I begin a 6 month course of treatment for relapsed Mantle Cell Lymphoma starting this Monday, June 13. I too am a Christian. Your blog Jai, although I only discovered it this year, has been a source of strength and wisdom for me. The example of Allistaire’s and your fierce determination I will keep ever before me. We Catholics believe that intercessory prayer includes the saints in Heaven, so I will constantly invoke Allistaires’ spirit to pray for me for strength, joy, faithful constancy and love. May God bless you, Sten and Solveig with His peace that passes all understanding,

  11. I wish I could have been there in person but thank you for making the service available to view online. I laughed and cried and might always have to dance with a pair of undies on my head henceforth. What a beautiful tribute to a beautiful, bright spirit. I heard that word used a lot throughout the service…BRIGHT. It is the word that always comes to my own mind when I think of you and Allistaire. I remember doing hospital laps with Olivia, when I was despairing at our life, and walking past your room. Your little space there, was always bursting and BRIGHT. Joy emanated and it gave me hope. So much hope. I am blessed to have crossed paths with you, even briefly. I miss your girl and am praying for you and your entire family as you navigate this tremendous loss. Love and warm thoughts from Texas.

    • I also wanted to say that I was in a funk today but after watching this, I gathered up my kids and took them swimming with friends. I chose to ditch the funk and embrace the joy. Thank you, Allistaire.

  12. We were with you all in spirit today celebrating and weeping and rejoicing with you for the life of your beautiful powerful abundantly joyful little Allistaire. She will be the impetus for joy for so many for many years to come. We love you and will continue to pray you forward in strength.
    Much love
    Meghan, Maria, JD and baby Kingston

  13. Dear Jai, I have just finished watching the memorial of Allistaire’s life.I am priveledged to have been exposed to your sweet family even though I know it is from afar. You are in my thoughts and prayers as you continue this life without your girl Allistaire Kieron Anderson.

  14. I think of you often, Jai. I don’t know you personally but I’ve known deep sorrow and have followed your story and somehow it connects us…sending love and hugs this holiday season. ❤️ You’re not alone.

  15. Just popping in to say I still think of your girl, and your story. You touched my heart deeply, and I pray you are experiencing a season of rest and peace.

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